Thursday, June 2, 2011

CLUB TIMEZ

ATTENTION MEN OF ITALY: 


PLEASE DO NOT SING TO ME IN MY EAR ON THE DANCE FLOOR.  I DO NOT WANT TO HEAR YOUR BROKEN ENGLISH VERSION OF RIHANNA'S "S&M." 


A Scene That Summarizes Last Night at "Twice"
**"Twice" is the name of the club we went to.  Very classy.  Even classier: we went to a place called "Shot Cafe" before.  Shot names included, Ghostbuster, Girl Scout Cookie, Sexi Lady, and Boobs


ME AND HANNAH:  Ciao
ITALIAN MEN: Ciao, bellas... Italian Italian...
ME AND HANNAH: (blank stares, awkward smiles)
ITALIAN MEN: You only speak English?  Awkward conversation...


DANCING COMMENCES


2 Seconds later...


ITALIAN MAN #1: Do you...Do you want to...spend....Do you want to stay the night with me?  
ME: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.  THAT. IS. TOO. FAST.


RUNNING AWAY COMMENCES





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